As If Harassers Deserve to Be Thanked
I was leaving the library and in a hurry to get to my apartment to retrieve some books before my next class. I live on franklin right by the compass, so the walk is practically twenty steps long. However, street harassment can still be a problem, even if you’re outside for less than five minutes.
A boy sitting with some friends outside of Hibbs Hall yelled that I had nice hair. I shot him a half-hearted smile, being in a hurry and not really appreciating the shouting, but then something surprising happened. Another boy sitting with him yelled out, “What, you’re not going to say thank you?” I kept walking, now annoyed, and another guy yelled “ya rude Bitch!”
I was too strapped for time to retort appropriately, so I ended up ignoring them. I’m surprised how angry I still feel, both at these boys and at myself for not taking the time to inform them how much they had offended me.
Yelling a compliment and then expecting me to come over and thank him? Calling me a bitch for minding my own business? I’m just waiting for it to happen again, which it certainly will now that summer is coming. I’m not obligated to respond to anyone’s catcalling. Next time it gets personal I don’t care how many better things I have to do, I’m going to give these disrespectful idiots a piece of my mind.
Hey RVA!
Just a reminder that we’re still here and we want your stories!
If you’re not comfortable sharing your story but you’d like to share your opinion, you can submit op-eds about local Richmond happenings and how they relate to street harassment, rape culture and/or kyriarchical violence. Just email your piece to us at rva@ihollaback.org, or you can post a link on our Facebook site!
Similarly, if you are active with another related group or cause, you can let us know about events and calls-to-action, by either posting it on our Facebook site or emailing us the information so we can put it on the main site.
If you’re really interested in the Hollaback cause and want to help us out, we’re putting together an interest meeting soon, we’ll have information up in the next few weeks.
See you around!
Don’t holla at Hunter!
So a girlfriend and I were visiting Richmond from DC (as I do on a regular occasion). Ive always felt pretty safe there but this exchange changed that for me forever. I should mention that this happened a few months back but I just thought of writing it while posting my usual harassment on the DC Hollaback board.
It was late night/early morning and we were stopping for gas before leaving RVA and going home to DC. We were stopped at a 7-11. My friend stayed in the drivers seat of the car while I walked in to pay. There were about 5 boys/men (ages ranging from about 18-22) outside of the 7-11 in their car. Once I walked past they got out and one of them stated catcalling me. I shot him a dirty look at the register and told him to ‘Back off, hes messing with the wrong one’. One of his friends stepped up and apoligised for his buddies behaviour stating he was drunk. I told him he better get control of his friend. They left and I thought the exchange was done.
Once back at the car I began pumping gas, my friend still in the drivers seat. I turn around to see their car pulled up directly next to ours almost blocking us in. One of the guys got out and opened our passenger door and began getting in our car. I have no idea what came over me. But I bolted over to him and grabbed his jacket, yanking him back and slamming the car door shut.
(This next part I do not recommend anyone doing unless trained! I have 15 years experience in different styles of martial arts and have taught womens self deffence classes)
I put my hand in my pocket on my knife, just in case, and began yelling at the top of my lungs for them to back the fuck off. There were at least 3 other cars getting gas (all of which did nothing) so I pointed out that there were witnesses so they shouldn’t be dumb. The ‘man’ who tried to get in the car put his hands up and retreated back to his passenger seat, but the ones in the safety of the back seat continued to smack talk.
I then pulled out my knife and opened it, continuing to tell them if they get any closer they will get hurt. One of the guys recoiled but then pretended to look for his gun he claimed to have. the driver (who seemed horrified by his friends actions and was the one who apoligised) hit the gas pedal and sped off.
I couldnt believe that had just happened and was so grateful that it didnt escalate. I looked at the other drivers getting gas (all male, whose mouths were gaping) with disgust and got in the car and left.
I just want to say again, that it is not like me to pull a knife and that it is very risky and could possibly just enrage the offenders more. I don’t recommend it and I was shocked by myself for even doing it.
Harassed in Lowes
I’ve been verbally assaulted countless times in my four years in Richmond and even sexually assaulted as a sophomore. I think the worst verbal attack I received was in Lowe’s on Broad Street. My roommate and I were shopping for planks of wood for an art project when two men approached us, pretended to be employees, and offered to help us carry the wood to the counter. They didn’t have the red Lowe’s shirt but it didn’t cross my mind at the time. They started aggressively flirting with us, refusing to leave even though we gave off clear signals that we wanted to be alone. Eventually, one of them men asked me, “Is your hair naturally red?” I said, “That’s none of your business.” He responded, “Just wanted to know if everything matched.” The thing that shocks me is that these men clearly thought this behavior was permissible since they were doing it in broad daylight in a public place full of people. But what shocks me even more is that no bystander intervened when I know several people could hear what was going on.
Hollaback Richmond Awareness party: Postponned
Date TBA but you won’t have to wait long! We’ll have a new date soon and it won’t be far away!
We’ll still have free food and it’ll still be at Aloft.
You can RSVP on our event page and wait for the announcement to come to you!
Rachel: “things need to change”
I just came back from the library and I am so infuriated that I knew posting my story here would be the best way to vent.
From the library, my apartment is approximately 10 minutes walking distance. In this time period I was solicited over 5 different times (my walk is seriously from the library to Broad Street). The first time was right outside of the library and I was being hollered at by a group of guys and even some of their girlfriends! It got to the point where I had to turn around and say something. I approached them and scolded them for how they verbally attacked me and expressed my disappointment in the women who joined in, who should understand why this is so degrading! The guys were talking about my butt and making detailed observations as to how they enjoyed how it moved while I walked, obviously inappropriate, and the girls followed them by whistling and hooting at me. Of course everyone apologized, but it doesn’t really mean anything at this point. I then got hollered at by cars passing by, a group of VCU students who were standing in front of Rhoads and then Brandt, and of course by a man on his bicycle when I finally reached Broad. If I had given everyone a speech who had verbally assaulted me tonight I’d be out of breath. People do not realize how these kinds of situations have honestly altered my lifestyle. I am actually fearful of walking from Point A to B, regardless of time or place. My paranoia is skyrocketing, things need to change.
Lori: “shut the f* up!”
My friend and I were leaving Stuffy’s around 6:30pm, headed toward our class together in Hibbs. It was getting dark outside, and as we were walking down the sidewalk, an older man walked by us, but he was walking very slowly. As we passed him, he said something along the lines of, “Damn girls! You be lookin’ fine!” I was actually a lot more pissed off than afraid, so I stopped walking, turned around, and told him to shut the f*** up. I think my response startled him because he gave me a funny look and walked away. I guess I ruined his attempt to dominate and intimidate two young women. Good!
Mia’s Story
A few nights ago, my two girlfriends and I were waiting to cross Broad St. While we were waiting, a group of about six or seven guys came up behind us and started shouting things like, “Damn girls, where you goin’ tonight” and “look at that ass!” Those who weren’t throwing out comments were whistling, clapping and laughing. All three of us were extremely intimated and were just hoping to get across the street as fast as possible. It seemed like we were standing there forever. This group of guys just wouldn’t leave us alone. Finally, we crossed the street safely but we were pretty shaken up by it.
